Australia arrive in Adelaide 2–0 up in the Ashes and, for the first time in the series, England are heading somewhere that removes all excuses.

England were two overs into the second Test and already looking for the fire exit. Mitchell Starc took two wickets in his first five balls, both openers gone for nothing, and the Gabba settled in for another long weekend of English pain. Then Joe Root walked out.

What a start. The urn arrived in Perth with all the usual fanfare, but the opening session delivered a reminder that Ashes cricket never waits to throw a punch.